Pay Backs

Emily: Bill always says that when I try to do something [mean] to him, that God doesn't like it. Now, in our Methodist beliefs, we do not believe our God is a vengeful God (at least I don't). It's really more of a joke. But it happens every time. For instance: we're joking around and Bill says something as a joke, so I playfully go to punch him/kick him/aim something at him, and I somehow always get hurt instead. Always. It's become quite amusing.

Bill: It never seems to amuse you at the time. I think it is always hilarious.

Emily: This morning, I was typing my blog. Go read it. Please. At the end, I had wrapped it all up and was just finishing when all of a sudden I decided to dump my hot, freshly poured, full cup of coffee in my lap. I jumped up and left all electronics to go jump immediately in the shower. I was dripping with coffee.

Bill: But the important thing is that there was enough coffee left to refill her mug, since I had not made a full pot, since I knew I wouldn't be drinking my normal 8 cups. Crisis averted.

Emily: As I was mopping up my desk, I sort of chuckled to myself. I had just glanced up at my computer screen and seen my blog. My blog which isn't trying to be hurtful, but I could hear Bill's voice, "See what happens when you're mean to me?" So here I am, writing a second blog of the morning. I'm hoping to set the planets straight. I'm giving Bill a chance to add in words to his defense (even though he wasn't even here when this happened).

Bill: And I admit I didn't cover the stupid beans. It was literally the first time in months I haven't covered something. But, in the sake of full diclosure, you also microwaved beans the night before and you aren't as perfect as you like to think you are. So, it's 50-50 and the last time you accused me you burnt your legs off. Seems to me it would be a lot easier to just take the blame. Just sayin'.